gravityeyelids | Mar. 16th, 2019

Mar. 16th, 2019

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robotlyra:

brainstatic:

We naturally put millionaires and billionaires in the same general class of person, but the only reason to do that is because the words are similar. Since these aren’t numbers we can actually visualize, it’s important to understand what a billion of something is. To travel a million inches, you’d have to travel from the Southern-most tip of Manhattan and go to the Bronx. To travel a billion inches, you’d have to fly from New York to Shanghai twice. A million seconds is a little over 11 days. A billion seconds is nearly 32 years. A million ounces is about the weight of a train car. A billion ounces is 4.5 Eiffel Towers. Use these to conceptualize what the difference between a millionaire and a billionaire is, and the absurd amount of wealth we’re talking about.

Millionaire: I can buy a fancy sports car, and a huge house!

Billionaire: I can buy THE SPACE PROGRAM
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bunnylikearabbit:

smallest-feeblest-boggart:

post–grad:

my writing ability currently feels on par with that of like…. a seven year old. i’m just writing one sentence. then another sentence. subject verb object, dependent clause period. do any of them relate? unclear. that is for god to decide. i certainly can’t.

the url makes this so much funnier
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softjoy:

my heart and prayers to all my muslim friends, followers, and your families
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lupitasource:

Lupita Nyong’o
© Paola Kudacki / The Edit by Net-A-Porter | March 2019
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legislacerator:

look i hate wishy washy shitty liberal politics as much as the next person but y'all live in a different world if you interact with a stranger who turns out to be a liberal and feel annoyed instead of relieved

like have you met conservatives??? have you met republicans and alt-right freaks?????? have you had to prepare food or sell goods to or perform services for people who actively hate marginalized people and tell you that to your face

i get all the meta about why liberalism is bad because it is but at the end of the day working minimum wage and serving liberals makes me marginally less afraid for my life

once again can anyone on this website please consider us uneducated proles who live in the real world
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tearlessrain:

prksoda:

shakescene:

the only adjectives in the english language:

1. tender

2. feral

3. horny

for your consideration
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hotcommunist:

hotcommunist:

if anyone needs cheering up here are some of the names of the seals at ireland’s seal rehab centre:

honourable mention to: el taco, wolverine, haggis, ham, nacho, and terry.

haggis, lord farquad, and…

marty the blob
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silverhawk:

silverhawk:

dare i say that stuffed animals are one of the single greatest inventions of all time and im thankful every day for the fact that someone thought to make animals but in huggable plush form…..saved me from a lot of bad nights and nightmares as a kid, i love you stuffed animals

i just wanna thank stuffed animals for existing, thank you for being stuffed pals for all these years
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rubegoldbergsaciddreams:

oh no
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pyreo:

A normal ass confirmation button at the bottom of a normal internet form: Submit

My fucking gremlin brain every time for the last 10 years:
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sunflowergfs:

Sometimes i feel i’ve got to

*Tchaikovsky physically manifests in my house and fires two canon balls, destroying my home*

run away
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sayares13:

penrosesun:

lethalbutterfly:

marsixm:

lunargrim:

tilthat:

TIL George Lucas originally planned to make a sci-fi film called “Space Pirates 9000” but William Friedkin urged him to change the name to “Star Wars”

via reddit.com

The more I find out about the original trilogy, the more I see its success depended entirely on the people around George Lucas telling him No.

fuck yall space pirates 9000 is a way better title

@sayares13, @penrosesun, hit us with the broom cupboard theory, you guys tell it better than me.

Ok, ok – here’s what probably definitely happened:

The true genius behind these films was some random uncredited intern who figured out how to siphon pure creative energy off of screenwriters and use it to fuel production. During the writing, filming, and editing of Star Wars, the folks at 20th Century Fox simply locked George Lucas in a nearby broom closet, and used the creative energy that they extracted from him to power the creation of the movie.

Occasionally, Lucas would break out of the broom closet and shout something incoherent like “Ewoks… I want Ewoks everywhere…!” and then they’d all go “well, shit, how did George Lucas get out of the broom closet?! I guess now we have to put that in the film too– someone lock him up again before he says anything else that stupid.”

Just a quick addendum, I cannot find any independent verification for the “Space Pirates 9000” trivia. The OP on Reddit just linked the Wikipedia article for Star Wars which didn’t even include that information at the time. The earliest verified title that I can find is “Journal of the Whills, Part I” which was a two-page outline George Lucas wrote in 1973 that would eventually become Star Wars.

Tl;dr this was a good excuse to tell our funny broom closet theory but the trivia from the OP is probably not true, as amusing a name as “Space Pirates 9000” is.
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madamehearthwitch:

nonasuch:

nonasuch:

Yesterday I overheard someone talking about how he was taking classes at the University of Maryland because they offer free tuition if you’re over 60.

My brain IMMEDIATELY began scripting a screwball comedy in which a broke millennial who desperately want to finish his long-abandoned degree but is drowning in student debt pretends to be a senior citizen in order to attend college for free.

I’m picturing someone Channing Tatumesque, applying age makeup every morning before he heads off to class. It’s sort of a cross between 21 Jump Street and Mrs. Doubtfire. He keeps forgetting which hip is supposed to be his bad one. His classmates laugh every time he uses slang. There’s definitely a scene where he attends a college party and busts it up on the dance floor.

He catches the eye of a fellow returning student, a woman in her 50s, but she thinks he’s like 70 and she’s already buried one husband, you know? She’s not interested in doing that again. When his charade unravels (hilariously) at the end of the movie, though, she finds out he’s actually like 30 and has abs you could bounce a quarter off. And he’s still super into her. And really, maybe it’s time she gave May-December romance a chance.

Okay so to refine this concept a little:

Our Hero is stuck in a job where he keep seeing people get promoted past him because they have a 4-year degree and he doesn’t. He can’t afford to go back to school until he finishes paying off his student loans for the degree he’s one semester from completing. If he got the promotion he wants he could pay them off a lot quicker. But he can’t get the promotion without the degree.

Along comes a clerical error in his almost-alma mater’s records which lists his birth year as 1948 instead of 1984. He gets a call from them about their “free tuition for seniors” program. “Wow, that sounds amazing!” he says. “I’ll be sure to tell my, uh, grandpa, as soon as he gets home.”

It’s one semester. If he can keep up the charade, he’ll have the degree, get the promotion, pay off the student loans. Hell, if they figure it out after the fact and come after him for the tuition, he’ll be able to afford it by then. He just needs to pass as a 70-year-old until graduation. How hard could it be?

(also, someone in the notes suggested “Senior Year” for a title, which is PERFECT.)

Holy shitballs.
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cinnabongene:

“i’ll never be a real adult” i say as i work 40 hours a week at a stuffy office job, come home and spend the evening cooking and cleaning before relaxing on the couch with the 2019 ikea catalogue
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That feeling when you write an entire fic in your head at 3 am while trying to sleep
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westwallys:

LUPITA NYONG’O
for The Edit by Net-A-Porter (2019), ph. Paola Kudacki.
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bivalentine:

my life is missing a homoerotic scene where i come to an old castle seeking shelter from a storm- all helpless and shivering with a white blouse plastered to my body by the rain- only for the door to be opened by my mysterious vampire love interest holding a candle and saying “oh you poor thing…lets get you warmed up” and then i get railed.
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cptsdwillgraham:

bogfox:

cptsdwillgraham:

i’m fucking begging everyone on this website to learn how to use a search engine because i just saw a post with 700,000 notes that asserted that crying physically drains Unbalanced Emotion Chemicals from your brain. yes this is literally a medieval humorist theory

We should know by now that unbalanced emotions can only be drained by leeches

now this is the kind of rigorous medical science i want to hear
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protect-and-love-animals:
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baiovevo:

Oh u love ur mom? Name 3 of her albums
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thesunshore:

coming out dramatically and redundantly is PEAK gay culture
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onlytwitterpics:
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xxyuniexx:

kiokushitaka:

#my exact thoughts before i scrolled down
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yesterdaysprint:

St. Tammany Farmer, Covington, Louisiana, May 16, 1903
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marudyne:

B&W doodles, the first three are from last night doodle stream
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reverseracism:
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indifen:

nthn27:

Me approaching 30

The dental assistant I saw today was delighted at me saying ‘don’t half-ass anything–you gotta whole-ass it,’ because she likes learning that “youth” stuff to sling at her teenagers. So I taught her the proper usage of “yeet/yote”, and as I left the dentist office I heard a distant “YEET” and then crashing sounds in the back.
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mostlysignssomeportents:

If you wear glasses, you might have noticed that they’ve been getting
steadily more expensive in recent years, no matter which brand you buy
and no matter where you shop.

That’s because a giant-but-obscure company called Luxottica bought out
Sunglass Hut and Lenscrafters, then used their dominance over the retail
side of glasses to force virtually every eyewear brand to sell to them
(Luxxotica owns or licenses Armani, Brooks Brothers, Burberry, Chanel,
Coach, DKNY, Dolce & Gabbana, Michael Kors, Oakley, Oliver Peoples,
Persol, Polo Ralph Lauren, Ray-Ban, Tiffany, Valentino, Vogue and
Versace); and used that to buy out all the other eyewear retailers of
any note (Luxottica owns Pearle Vision, Sears Optical, Sunglass Hut and
Target Optical) and then also bought out insurers like Eyemed Vision
Care and Essilor, the leading prescription lens/contact lens
manufacturer.

Controlling the labs, insurers, frame makers, and all the major retail
outlets has allowed Luxottica to squeeze suppliers – frames are cheaper
than ever to make, thanks to monopsony buying power with Prada-grade
designer frames costing $15 to manufacture – while raising prices as
much as 1000% relative to pre-acquisition pricing.

It’s even worse for lenses: a pair of prescription lenses that cost $1.50 to make sell for $800 in the USA.

LA Times columnist David Lazarus wrote a column about skyrocketing eyewear prices
and was approached by Charles Dahan, who once owned one of the largest
frames companies in America, Custom Optical, which supplied 20% of the
frames sold at Lenscrafters prior to the Luxottica acquisition. Dahan
describes how Luxottica cornered the horizontal and vertical markets for
eyewear and pushed out or bought out every other company (Oakley
refused to sell or lower prices, so Luxottica boycotted it from its
retailers, forcing the company into such a precarious position that it
Luxottica was able to buy it for a fraction of its peak book-value just a
few years later).

This is a good example of how decades of far-right ideologically driven antitrust malpractice
has hurt everyone. After all, glasses aren’t just a fashion item:
they’re a necessity for people with poor vision, a prerequisite for
driving, walking, cycling, reading, getting an education or doing your
job.

Luxottica grew through acquisition, by buying up its competition. This was banned under classic antitrust law,
until the Reagan years. This pattern has been repeated in many other
domains: beer, whiskey, retail pharmacies, and so on. In every one of
those domains, we are getting screwed, as are small businesspeople and
the families they serve.

https://boingboing.net/2019/03/12/luxottica.html
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by Irina Iriser

by Irina Iriser

by Irina Iriser

by Irina Iriser

by Irina Iriser

floralls:

by Irina Iriser
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aqueerkettleofish:

jakemorph:

i wanna watch spiderverse but do i have to see spidertop and spiderbottom first or does it not matter?

It is not necessary to watch Venom to see Spiderverse, no.
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sonderjack:

strawberryoverlord:

full offense but we seriously need to destroy the shitty toxic gamer culture that involves getting mad at newbie players for fucking existing.

like im sorry but shitting on noobs is fucking low ball and pathetic. Im so fucking sorry someone is more capable of having fun trying out a new game then you are mr edgelord

“lmao noobs should stop-” Maybe YOU should stop acting like your king of whatever game your playing get over youself and let other people have fun too

Youre not a fucking pro stop trying to act like you are just cause someone else is new to the game you play.

#….and please let even older players make mistakes and have bad days
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bihaze:

reasons why jake peralta being bi would be good:

-bi men are wildly underrepresented

-he’s older. jesus christ please can we have a bi person who isn’t a “edgy no labels teen experimenter”…its ok to realize you’re bi when youre older , its ok to say bi!

-he’s faithfully and happily married. i think something that goes undiscussed is the fact that you can realize you are bi and still be faithful, loving, and committed to your partner, and that being bi can still be a major part of your identity even while in a relationship (even a “het” one)

-t w O bi chAraCters

-we all want that fucking john mulaney episode you know we do
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melancholymango:

I did the being edgy and self-deprecating thing, it gets old. I wanna be soft and lovely and easily impressed. I wanna appreciate all the little things that make me happy the same way I’ve dwelled on every single thing that upsets me.
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inkecl:

saw this on twitter, thought it might be helpful!

source: alisonykim
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gothammite:

i have something to say
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candiikismet:

gif87a-com:

Animal Gaits for Animators by Stephen Cunnane

This is so amazing
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ouendanl:

merrakie:

ouendanl:

the sequel

how does this keep happening

THANK YOU FOR CONVEYING THIS ONE I HATE THOSE
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scootsenshi:

weeelllp:

rsbenedict:

kaijutegu:

roachpatrol:

I WOULD PAY TEN TIMES AS MUCH FOR CHOCOLATE IF IT MEANT REDUCING THE AMOUNT OF SLAVES IN THE WORLD? HOW IS THIS ANY KIND OF PROBLEM.

good news, you can! the company’s called Tony’s Chocolonely and their entire purpose is to make slave-free chocolate and reform the chocolate industry.

https://tonyschocolonely.com/us/en

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tony%27s_Chocolonely

Whole Foods carries it. If you don’t want to support an Amazon-owned company, World Market carries it. You can also buy it directly from the company.

It’s the best chocolate I’ve ever had and it’s 100% slave free. Tony’s Chocolonely works really hard to push for transparency within the chocolate industry and actually has and is following an action plan to eliminate slavery within cocoa production. They’re good people who make good chocolate.

A list of slavery-free chocolate companies:

Aldi

Aloha Feels Chocolate

Alma Chocolate

Alter Eco Chocolate

Amano Chocolate

Askinoise Chocolate

The Beach Chocolate Factory

Belicious

Black Mountain Chocolate

Cacaoteca

Caribeans Chocolate

Castronovo Chocolate

Charm School Chocolates

Chocolate Cartel

Chocolat Celeste

Chocolate Tree

Chocolate Troubadour

Choconat

Coco Chocolate

Compartes Chocolates

Dandelion Chocolate

Dark Forest Chocolate

Denman Island Chocolate

Divine Chocolate Co.

Eating Evolved

Eat Your Hat

El Ceibo

The Endangered Species

Equal Exchange

Fairafric

Forever Cocoa

Fresco Chocolate

Fruition Chocolate

Gayleen’s Decadence

GEPA Chocolate

Giddy Yo Yo

Grenada Chocolate Company

Grocer’s Daughter Chocolate

Guittard

Habitual Chocolate

Hagensborg Chocolates

Health by Chocolate

Hilo Shark Chocolate

HNINA Gourmet

Honest Artisan Chocolate

Hooray Tuffles

Ithaca Fine Chocolates

L.A. Burdick Chocolates

La Iguana Chocolate

Lake Champlain Chocolates

La Siembra Cooperative

Lillie Belle Farms

Madecasse

Malagasy

Maverick Chocolate Company

Max Havelaar

Mayan Monkey

Mayordomo

Mia Chocolate

Montezuma’s Chocolates

Nayah Amazon Chocolates

Newman’s Own Organics

Purdy’s Chocolate

Omanahene Cocoa Bean Company

Ombar

OpuLux Fair Trade Chocolate

Original Hawaiian Chocolate

Parliament Chocolate

Montevérgine

Patric Chocolate

Plamil Organic Chocolate

Potomac Chocolate

Pure Lovin’ Chocolate

Rain Republic

Rapunzel Pure Organics

Ritual Chocolate

Samaritan Xocolata

Sappho Chocolates

Seed & Bean Chocolate

Shaman Chocolates

Sibú Chocolate

Solkiki Chocolate

Sweet Earth Chocolates

Sweet Impact Fudge

Sweet Riot

Sun Eaters Organics

Taza Chocolate

Terra Nostra Organic

Terroir Chocolate

TCHO

The Chocolate Wave

Theo Chocolate

The Original Chocolate Bar (Houston, TX)

Tobago Estate Chocolate

TONY’S CHOCOLONELY

Vivani Chocolate

Vosges

Wei of Chocolate

Xocolatl Chocolate

Zotter

Crazy how the main three chocolate companies in the US are all terrible

Makes sense
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