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biwitched:

just-shower-thoughts:

The division symbol, ÷, is just a blank fraction. You replace the dots with the numbers.
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ofthefog:

writing-prompt-s:

Scientists uncover a stone with writing on it that no one can make sense of. When you see it for the first time, you can read it perfectly.
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constable-connor:

colehersch:

Pocket Pussy Review

Fucking christ, lmao
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thesleepypencil:

Been thinking about Aliens recently
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memelovingbot:

20 minutes into mitochondria and chill he gives you this look
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miyazakishuuto:

miyazakishuuto:

scar’s brother was ultra hot and im so mad he is dead

I JUST REALIZED THAT I SHOULD CLARIFY THAT I AM WATCHING FMA: BROTHERHOOD AND I AM NOT IN FACT LUSTING AFTER MUFASA, SCAR’S DEAD BROTHER IN THE LION KING
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ofthefog:

Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming
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geniewithwifi:

matt-the-blind-cinnamon-roll:

zaubermauz:

haveabiscxitpotter:

our-hideout-world:

“”EXPECTO PATRONUM!” Harry yelled. Nothing happened. Harry gripped his dick tighter and shook it up and down until a thick, whispy white substance protruded from the end of it.” 

“Panting, Harry fell forwards over the hydrangea bush, straightened up and stared around. There were several faces peering through various nearby windows. Harry stuffed his dick hastily back into his jeans and tried to look innocent.”

“He had not been this close to Malfoy since he had watched him muttering to Crabbe and Goyle during Dumbledore’s speech about Cedric. He could feel a kind of ringing in his ears. His hand gripped his dick under his robes”

“My dick.” Said Ron. “Look at my dick.” It had snapped, almost in two, and the tip was dangling limply, held on by only a few spare splinters.

Ron struggled for a moment before managing to extract his dick from his trousers. “It’s no wonder I can’t get it out, Hermione, you packed my old jeans, they’re tight!” “Oh, I’m so sorry,” hissed Hermione, and Harry heard her mutter a suggestion as to where Ron could stick his dick instead.
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dankcommunismmemes:

How I’m raising my children.
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pcpumped:

A friend of mine made sure this is what I woke up to this morning
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barduil:

me: I’m so excited to write this fic, it’s going to be good, I love it, I’m so pumped

*writes it in head before sleeping, gets emotional over songs that could fit the story, elaborates background and characterisations, writes lines on phone*

also me, in front of laptop: yeah, but no, I’ve got nothing
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ask-overlord-phasesixer:

digg:

what in the wide world of hell did i just watch.
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in-fi-ni:

a pretty standard arrangement for engagement rings. a raised stone is better than nothing. 3/10

a lovely, simple, elegant wedding band. a classic anybody would be pleased to get married with. useless in a fight. 0/10

huge. tacky. kinda pretty tho. but look at that raised diamond in the center. you could easily break someone’s tooth with this. 7/10

also huge and tacky. at first glance you’d think the rounded edge might not cause much damage but look at how those rows of diamonds are raised in the second view. you could really rip up someone’s face. 9/10

this one is almost elegant. no sharp edges, but it’s solidly built. you would cause more damage with the ring on than off, which is a solid basis for choosing an engagement ring. 5/10

a lovely design, i enjoy open filigree. however im not sure how said filigree would stand up to the impact of being slammed into someone’s face. 2/10

the twisting design is pretty, but im not entirely sure that socking someone in the jaw wouldnt break off those stones. it looks somewhat reinforced but do you really want to leave the Punching Power of  your engagement ring up to chance? i wouldnt. two raised stones tho. 6/10, pending experimentation

HAHAHAHA holy shit. thats Five raised stones, with reinforced prongs, for maximum damage at any angle. i highly recommend this ring both for its sapphire centerpiece and its capacity for causing pain. 10/10

there’s not even a stone, its just gold which aint exactly the hardest metal in the world. just fucking stay home if you’re not going to take this seriously.
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shortandsweet:

wetshovel:

mistresskabooms:

no-good-nik:

the-independent-jew:

no-good-nik:

the-independent-jew:

no-good-nik:

i have this month’s glamour. THEY REALLY THINK GEAR SHIFTS ARE A MENORAH

I’M SCREAMING

wat D:

part of me refused to believe that a mainstream magazine could really misidentify gear shifts cuff links as menorah cuff links and advertise them as an appropriate hanukkah gift, but no, the goyim have gone and done it. 

what the everloving fuck?!

I’m literally in shock rn.

i know! i was literally sitting here like

Is this just the start of a modern Hanukkah legend? The 7 hour car trip that ran on 1 hours worth of gas? I hope not

If you ever wanted to dump the clutch and really get a holiday in gear, here’s your chance!

OMG THAT PUN
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ronnyglossia:

Think about what you’d expect a Tonberry’s voice to be like and then listen to this

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