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[personal profile] gravityeyelids
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Because I’m absolutely in love with falling in love. 

Because I live for the moment when your stomach drops out underneath you and your pulse races and you realize with absolute certainty that you’re going to be kissed for the first time.

Because I want to know people. REALLY KNOW PEOPLE. I want to get inside them and learn their dark places and discover the strange ways our edges fit together. I want to learn and teach and create and grow and grow.

Because I want to offer support and ask for support and be strong together and be weak together. 

Because I have so much strength to offer, it feels stifling to mould my energy to one solitary partner’s needs. 

Because I have so many weaknesses, so many imperfections, so many egregious flaws, insecurities, and doubts, it feels unfair to foist them all on one, lonely human, to demand that they understand me perfectly, that they always be enough. 

Because I see humans like prisms, refracting their personalities like light, and because I gain nourishment for each band of color within myself from different people and different experiences.

Because nothing in the world feels more natural to me than kissing my friends. Or holding my friends. Or fucking my friends.

Because I want to live in a warm. bolstering place in this cold, touch-starved world. And I’ve managed to create one for myself.

Because it’s worth the effort it takes to make it work, and my work to maintain my lifestyle has nourished the best parts of me – honesty, self-knowledge, respect, bravery, and compassion.

Because why the hell are we on this poorly-insulated rock of a planet if we aren’t going to grab life with both hands and have as many experiences as we possibly can?

Because this is who I am. This is what brings me joy. And who doesn’t want to feel joyful?
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Rachel

April 2019

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