foxyshadow: neurodivergent-crow: thecoldheartofspace: so

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foxyshadow:

neurodivergent-crow:

thecoldheartofspace:

so there’s this guy in three of my dance classes

and first off, I’m 5'7, 5'11 in dance shoes, 170 pounds, broad shoulders and big hips and not small in any dimension. For a ballroom dancer, this means a lot of time spent learning the men’s parts. Especially in lifts.

I’ve had years now of guys kinda just going “lol heck naw” when told to lift me. I don’t admit this part much, but it makes me want to sink into the ground and die when every other girl can be lifted, but I’m just too big.

So this guy, smaller than me and really cute, shows up at auditions and I see this girl across the room getting tossed about like the beautiful pixie she is, and apparently I looked a little wistful because this boy asked me if I liked lifts.

“Oh. I… Uh… I’ve never really done the girls part. I’m a little big, haha…” (laugh it off, as usual.)

He looked me dead in the eye and then picked me up like a movie princess, bounced me in the air a few times, and set me down effortlessly while telling me whoever refused to lift me before was just being a lazy wimp.

I seriously doubt this boy will ever really get how much that meant to me. But, holy cow. Some faith in humanity just got restored.

Magical Boy of Body Positivity

This is beautiful
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girlsmoonsandstars: internetdumpsterfires: Previously unsaid...

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girlsmoonsandstars:

internetdumpsterfires:

Previously unsaid sentence in human history

now i keep getting random snap chats asking if my dick is hungry for ants
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open rp

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taahko:

villneuve:

taahko:

villneuve:

Hey can I get seven large cokes and a bbq sauce

is pepsi ok

‘i guess’ i said sulking, my amber hued orbs peering down because of gravity

‘ok.’ i hand you seven large cokes and a pepsi
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collapsedsquid: WARNING. In our butcher’s shop

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collapsedsquid:

WARNING. In our butcher’s shop we might ask your name and remember your meat-related preferences. If you are worried about this, please enter the shop while shouting ‘I DO NOT AGREE!’, and we will henceforth pretend we don’t know you.

(From here)
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Things Judaism values, in order

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transkidblink:

captainlordauditor:

remaining alive

learning

being a fighty bitch

spite

being kind, when you can

being nice to ghosts

All of the notes on this post is just people adding food and arguing about the order and this is why being a fighty bitch is that high up
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the sound of music is so iconic

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reystars:

like

the nuns roasting maria in three part harmony

‘the dress. you’ll have to put on another one before meeting the children’
‘when we enter the abbey our worldly clothes are given to the poor’
‘what about this one?’
‘the poor didn’t want this one’

all seven children bursting into tears at dinner while Maria sips her tea

‘God bless whats his name’ (ten minutes later) ‘KURT! that’s the one I left out! God bless Kurt.’

maria passive aggressively praying about Liesl as she climbs through the window

tbh Captain Von Trapp dragging everyone around him at every possible moment like

‘you flatter me captain’ ‘oh I’m sorry, I meant to accuse you’ *AIR HORN SOUNDS*

‘I’m not finished yet!’
‘OH YES YOU ARE, CAPTAIN.’
…
‘FRAULEIN’

liesl rolling her eyes at kurt during the blueberry/strawberry scene

honestly the love story I didn’t quite get as a kid but I’m SHOOK

when the baroness is trying to get the captain back on track but he just interrupts her and is like ‘there’s no use’

BUT WHEN THE BARONESS SAYS ‘well, she’ll never be a nun’ the look of SHOCK on his face like it honestly never occurred to him that Maria was in love with him too

so of course hes like ‘I must find her and kiss her immediately’

Von Trapp ripping the nazi flag in half like YES BINCH

THE MOST UNDERRATED SCENE THOUGH IS AFTER THE NAZIS RUN TO THEIR CARS TO CHASE THE VON TRAPPS AND THE SCENE SWITCHES TO THE TWO NUNS

‘reverend mother, I have sinned’
‘I too, reverend mother’
*they both hold up coils from the nazi’s cars*

anyway this movie is the best and I love it
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A Family Of Woodchucks Ate Paul Ryan's Car

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A Family Of Woodchucks Ate Paul Ryan's Car :

“House Speaker Paul Ryan explained Thursday that a family of woodchucks moved into his Chevy Suburban recently, eating the wiring, and rendering the car useless.
"My car was eaten by animals,” Ryan said, to laughs from an audience at an event hosted by the Economic Club of Washington D.C. “It’s just dead.”“

DIRECT ACTION
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mfrappe: is this a renaissance painting

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mfrappe:

is this a renaissance painting
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tutselutse: John Cleese just murdered a guy on twitter

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tutselutse:

John Cleese just murdered a guy on twitter
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maureen2musings: Sacred lavender merveceranphoto

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maureen2musings:

Sacred lavender

merveceranphoto
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vague-humanoid: anthonybourdainpartsunknown: corrective...

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vague-humanoid:

anthonybourdainpartsunknown:

corrective action

be the change you want to see in the world
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scampthecorgi: Can’t wait for scarf weather to

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scampthecorgi:

Can’t wait for scarf weather to come back!
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10knotes: Everybody stop what you’re doing, its

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10knotes:

Everybody stop what you’re doing, its a cat cleaning a baby

“Stupid furless humans can’t take care of their kitten, I have to do everything myself.”
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hi-imkingdavid: deepstateoperative: ravenhull: danthemedicman: ...

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hi-imkingdavid:

deepstateoperative:

ravenhull:

danthemedicman:

weloveshortvideos:

Well, that is one way to pass the time during a rain delay

This is the quality content I live for

Their respective team managers are off to the side next to each other…

“These are grown men…”

“On the clock.”

“Yeah… grown men….”

“… Bet my guys win easily.”

“You’re on.”

better than the actual sport they’re supposed to be playing tbh

Lmfaooook
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yesterdaysprint: The Atlanta Constitution, Georgia, November...

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yesterdaysprint:

The Atlanta Constitution, Georgia, November 13, 1925
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AI does not understand “sexy”

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lewisandquark:

Machine learning algorithms can uncover complex patterns in the data they see, making them useful for image recognition, predicting customer service questions, or recommending movies. They can even do a decent job at naming craft beers, kittens, or guinea pigs. But one thing it turns out they’re bad at? Understanding what humans find sexy.

I had my first sign that this was a problem when I trained a neural network to generate new Halloween costumes and saw its attempts at the “sexy” category of names - it came up with ideas like Sexy Gargles, Pretty zombie Space Suit, and Sexy the Spock. So when Scarlett O'Hairdye contacted me saying they were putting together an AI-themed burlesque show (yes you read that right), and asked me to train a neural network to generate possible names for the show… I knew the neural network was going to be in for a confusing time.

Now first let me talk about burlesque. If you’re not familiar with it, think feather boas, ruffled skirts, and fishnet stockings. These days, themed burlesque shows are all the rage, with names like “That Ass, Poor Yorick” “Star Trek: The Sexed Generation” and “Burl-X Files”. Scarlett provided me with 450 examples of existing shows and yes, the neural network proceeded to get very confused.

One thing it tried was making up words that sounded to it like sexytimes. It made no sense, but it was strangely adorable.

Booky Ampitions - A StravaganzaStarstox! A Burlesque 2Booms A Shagack!SPOW!Holiday Fishing Glasties off!Moosters, A burlesque tributeHomper Gurder Burlesque ShowShow! Thag Ag After DarkWoncerless!Boodnass Tronpboonsif Mongerland Bonshows of thong Yes of Nevering Eightthows!MACTAON! A Nighty Boosh Burlesque!Deeptert!“Thawls of Vinderland II - A Burrrrs?! Burlesque Revue”BUR!The Sexed Garks of Burlesque Adventure

Sometimes the sexy-sounding words it generated were already other words. For some reason it was trying hard to make vases sexy. It has an even harder task ahead of it with its other favorite words, “warts” and “fart”.

My 2017 Farty Burlesque AdventureVase Burlesque RevueThe Warts of Burlesque!The Wonderland - March of Farty FundraiserTeaks of Fame LegendsTree! A Burlesque RevueVase ShowGourdraiser!Sex-Pone CabaretSticker Burlesque Burlesque ShowThe Pans of The Panners Burlesque RevieThe Adomic Eso Space Scream ShowThe Hare and the Rare and the Mar Chas Burlesque RevueFarty Fasties: A Burlesque ShowThe Rank ShowVase & ShowVase FartsThe Stripper Stripper Dave Burlesque ShowAdventure To Burlesque Came Farts of Burlesque RevueSeattle Burlesque Show & Tangy Future and Warty For the Blue Door

Here I think it was trying to spell “boobs” or maybe “bombshells” but had a bit of an issue.

Burlesque Bonbs and Constray Burlesque BorbshellsBurlesque Borbs and Monstrous Burlesque ShowBolbshells!

Other times it got the words right, but used them rather… unskillfully.

Sex Your Eye Out!The Parts and Burlesque RevueThe Sexed ShowThe Pank: A Burlesque RevuePeepsing Tarts Burlesque ShowA Hot Care Show!Well New Cheapless!The Sexies of Burlesque RevueThe Hand ShowBurlesque Show About Your Peek ShowDerrierer: A Burlesque ShowCone With 9s Cabaret DerriereThe Pants of Fame Burlesque Adventure

And the name that was chosen? May I present to you the first-ever AI-themed burlesque show: 

My Rear’s On the Sexy

If you are lucky enough to be in Seattle, WA on July 21, 2018 (and are over 21), you can experience some of the strangest sexytimes that technology has to offer. Tickets!

And if you’d like to join my mailing list, you’ll get some examples of what happened when I trained a neural network on burlesque show names - AND ice cream flavors.
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elfyourmother: featherwurm: bramblepatch: wetwareproblem: skyheartstar13: wetwareproblem: thie...

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elfyourmother:

featherwurm:

bramblepatch:

wetwareproblem:

skyheartstar13:

wetwareproblem:

thievesguilding:

wetwareproblem:

thievesguilding:

wetwareproblem:

thievesguilding:

corvidobligation:

thievesguilding:

mickleburger:

thievesguilding:

thenightling:

honestly if you want to take proper care of your goths you shouldn’t take them outside in hot weather at all, just winter and MAYBE late autumn/early spring if you live in a cool climate

people really should do this kind of research before getting goths at all but as long as they’re willing to learn and adapt i guess

there are breeds of goth suitable for warmer climes but you have to be very careful when looking for one and you cannot assume that your goth is one of them if you don’t know for sure what they are

even the warm-climate breeds still usually do better in their native locale’s winter temperatures though, and shouldn’t be left outside in the summer unattended or, at the bare minimum, they should be given plentiful shade, cold water, and appropriate music to keep them calm

Honestly, if you want something less fragile than a goth, you should be considering something like a punk anyway. There’s no need to expose goths to the heat, IMHO. Admittedly there’s differences you need to do research on, but punks are very rewarding. And for God’s sake, if anyone tells you ANY emo can handle the heat, run. They don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about.

goths aren’t fragile though? they’re not heat-tolerant but they’re extremely hardy in dark and stormy weather, metal concerts, and dramatic emotional episodes. just because they aren’t well-suited to one weather pattern doesn’t mean they can’t be extremely hardy and rewarding to keep under conditions they’re better suited to.

Forget the climate thing, there’s a more important husbandry issue here:WHO THE FUCK PUT THEM OUT IN THE DAYTIME?Direct sunlight is extremely harmful to goths! THey should never be outdoors before twilight!Do your damn research, people.

you’re missing a key point though

goths need the opportunity to complain about sunlight, it’s vital to their wellbeing; as long as their time in it is carefully controlled and they’re given sufficient sunscreen and shade, it can be amazing and 100% necessary enrichment

Look at that picture. Look at it. Please tell me where the shade is, because I don’t see any. I see two goths wilting in direct sunlight. Just look at how flat their hair is! This is not even remotely acceptable care.

i never said the picture was a good example of goth husbandry, i think it’s sort of taken as a given that it’s not - nobody in this threat is endorsing it, op included

i’m just saying that it isn’t a black and white issue

Fair enough. I’ll concede that a properly-shaded porch or sunroom-type area can help them get the outdoor enrichment and complaining opportunities they need, without putting them at risk of direct sunlight or actually touching anything outdoors. But be careful not to overexpose them.

Aren’t there some varieties of goth that are built for sunlight, or is that me mistaking a similar species for goths?

You’re thinking of either New Romantics - unfortunately presumed extinct, you could tell them apart by their lack of Victorian plumage and occasional colouration - or Emos, which are the product of a crossbreeding with Shoegazers.

As mentioned above, emos don’t handle heat well, although they do better with moderate amounts of sun than purebred goths.

If it’s the ornate Victorian aesthetic you like but you want something that can keep up with a more active, diurnal lifestyle, you might consider a steampunk or steampunk cross? I know they’re somewhat out of fashion these days, but they can be just as endearingly dramatic as other goth breeds, and they thrive on daylight outings.

There IS a rarely seen breed of goth which IS suitable for diurnal needs though.  The highly unusual breed of the Sunshine Goth is completely content in daytime or nighttime environments and is very hearty and adaptable.  Unfortunately it does not display the distinctly dramatic coat patterns of a traditional Goth and it’s relations (which may be why the breed is so rare, it always seems like people favor form over function).  The breed’s behavior, interests, and tastes are all still easily defined as Goth, and they offer the same rewards.  You have to watch for unscrupulous breeders trying to pass an overpriced part-Raver off as a rare Sunshine Goth though, their needs are completely different, and the Raver will generally be much more brightly colored and energetic.

^ what they said

OP this is perkygoth erasure
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quiet-nymph: Photography by wasabitool 🌱

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quiet-nymph:

Photography by wasabitool 🌱
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