xtec: moonlandingwasfaked: xtec: moonlandingwasfaked: hypothesis: all vampires are nerds...

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xtec:

moonlandingwasfaked:

xtec:

moonlandingwasfaked:

hypothesis:

all vampires are nerds because after x number of years they have nothing better to do but study maths and science

if you think I can’t get smoked out every day and beat my meat to the point of exhaustion for thousands of years YOU’RE MISTAKEN

catch me exploring the world to find new places and only opening books to find new techniques to NUT
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fancyladssnacks: goattrain: Do you believe in Serena...

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fancyladssnacks:

goattrain:

Do you believe in Serena Williams?

I believe
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kuvshinov-ilya: plus...

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kuvshinov-ilya:

plus http://ift.tt/2gSUUrC
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soljua: reasons i haven’t replied back: -

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soljua:

reasons i haven’t replied back:

- i’m socially exhausted
- i don’t have the time right now
- i don’t know how to reply
- i have a bad memory and got distracted
- i’m having a depressive episode and don’t have the energy to socialise

not reasons i haven’t replied back:

- i’m ignoring you just because
- i hate you
- i’m fed up with you
- i don’t want to be your friend anymore
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armedandgayngerous: coonfootproductions: Proper punctuation is...

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armedandgayngerous:

coonfootproductions:

Proper punctuation is everything, people.

you: nut
me, an intellectual: boy syrup
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lesbiangonegirl: this is literally the funniest thing

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lesbiangonegirl:

this is literally the funniest thing I’ve ever seen goodbye
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stability:LOOK @ THIS PERFECTION

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stability:

LOOK @ THIS PERFECTION
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lovelylovelyartist: maneth985: awwwwww♥ This is

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lovelylovelyartist:

maneth985:

awwwwww♥

This is the cutest shit ever everything else can go home
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rose-highlight: a moment of silence for all the looks i would able to pull off if i had money

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rose-highlight:

a moment of silence for all the looks i would able to pull off if i had money
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bobcatmoran: ampora: someone spent my taxpayer dollars to name a...

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bobcatmoran:

ampora:

someone spent my taxpayer dollars to name a star NASTY 1 and i could not be happier

I went and checked this because it sounded ridiculous, but nope. NASA really has nicknamed it that. [source]
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mac-photo:NSFW: In the trees with #justinemariiie

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mac-photo:

NSFW:  In the trees with #justinemariiie
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mjalti: eclipticzero: mjalti: my plan is to jog in a zip code where the average house is $1...

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mjalti:

eclipticzero:

mjalti:

my plan is to jog in a zip code where the average house is $1 million dollars. i jog everyday. i run into the trophy wives jogging club. we jog past each other so often, they’re forced to interact with me. we’re friends now. i’m invited places. i meet other millionaires, men who love me. i marry the richest, using an alias. throughout the first year of marriage, i’m moving assets and cash to an off shore bank account. i fake my own death on our anniversary. he’s heartbroken.

i started jogging in a new million dollar neighborhood. i’ve just made friends with the local jogging crew headed by ashtonlynn and brotyna “chichi” who has a single millionaire brother,

Is there any version of this plan where I don’t have to jog

u only have to jog past the ladies which is like 46 seconds. suck it up for the fraud of it all
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snakestack: snakestack: Babies are always way stronger

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snakestack:

snakestack:

Babies are always way stronger than I expect

I think it’s because babies are always prepared to use 100% of their power in anything they do but a person holding a baby never wants to use more than 2% strength to restrain a baby
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theshitpostcalligrapher: catsbrew: theshitpostcalligrapher: alm...

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theshitpostcalligrapher:

catsbrew:

theshitpostcalligrapher:

almost one the first page, one line or so lefttt

Where can i buy this when it is finished?

The main pages has a “purchase your shitposts” page where it links to my etsy. I’ll also post an announcement alongside the final result so people have a direct link if they want. 
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notkatniss:I really truly feel god in this fucking chilis...

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notkatniss:

I really truly feel god in this fucking chilis tonight
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ilikelookingatnakedmen: orangesplorange11:I

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ilikelookingatnakedmen:

orangesplorange11:

I applaud👏🏾👏🏾. Those woman basically looked death in the face and chose to fight. Such bravery needs to be remembered.

I hadn’t seen the rest of these tweets
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marsincharge: sauvamente: This feels illegal I hope this...

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marsincharge:

sauvamente:

This feels illegal

I hope this blows all the way up and they get sued
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roses are red, cucumbers are green

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pencephobic:
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sodomymcscurvylegs: sodomymcscurvylegs: Me, on my way to steal your man: Only for like 20 minutes...

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sodomymcscurvylegs:

sodomymcscurvylegs:

Me, on my way to steal your man:

Only for like 20 minutes so I can have a sit down with him and tell him why he’s lucky to have you!

Me, on my way to return your now more considerate and appreciative man:
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supercalvin:*re-reads own fics when having

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supercalvin:

*re-reads own fics when having writer’s-block*
Wow I wish I could write like this :/
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mione:“Feminism is about giving women choice.

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mione:

“Feminism is about giving women choice. Feminism is not a stick with which to beat other women with. It’s about freedom, it’s about liberation, it’s about equality. I really don’t know what my tits have to do with it. It’s very confusing.” — Emma Watson on her Vanity Fair photo controversy.
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bubblesthewaterbender: gelfling: cockyhorror: rosie-girl: got...

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bubblesthewaterbender:

gelfling:

cockyhorror:

rosie-girl:

gotitforcheap:

this is so wild, this guy thought his landlord was going into his house and leaving him post-it notes but he just had an extreme case of carbon monoxide poisoning 

Modern ghost story

Did reddit save this dudes life

What the fuck

NO BUT I READ THIS WHOLE THING ONCE.

he got the CO detector out, saw that it was in dangerous levels (there was a problem with an underground parkade in his building, iirc), calmly went “shit”, and went to the hospital. If he didn’t get that advice, he would most likely be dead now.

The best part? He didn’t get a webcam app or anything. He just made a folder, called it Webcam, and called it a night in his carbon monoxide induced delirium.

This is honestly one of my favorite Reddit stories.
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little-trouble-grrrl: Christina Hendricks in her 90s teen goth...

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little-trouble-grrrl:

Christina Hendricks in her 90s teen goth days
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angeldrake3: justneckbeardthings: GIRLS PROTECT OTHER...

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angeldrake3:

justneckbeardthings:

GIRLS PROTECT OTHER GIRLS

Stay away from men who refer to women as females
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sabertoothwalrus: queeringfeministreality: sandandglass: Chelse...

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sabertoothwalrus:

queeringfeministreality:

sandandglass:

Chelsea Peretti: One Of The Greats

that was not where I was expecting it to go AND I LOVED IT
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furfangslazers: chilewithcarnage: classicalmonoblogue: Totall...

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furfangslazers:

chilewithcarnage:

classicalmonoblogue:

Totally valid critique as plus size male models get way too little attention and coverage, but they are out there working and looking fucking divine:

D.J. Terrell

Troy Solomon

Michael Anthony

Syed Sohail

Atkins Estimond

this post cleared my skin and watered my crops

As an aspiring plus size male model myself, these guys inspire me.
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