Sep. 18th, 2017

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onetwo-t:

Wine tasting in Tuscany
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shanalogic:

lynati:

whenthesecondsun:

Why do you have all those cloud babies scattered around your staircase

Someone swept out from under the bed, I see.

CLOUD BABIES. ☁️🐱☁️
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poorpersonsgiude:

smartass-stripper:

thatwitchaudrey:

smartass-stripper:

Okay I know one of you bitches has a TurboTax for Strippers Cheat Sheet. Reblog to save a life.

So:

Input how much money you made over the course of the year. This is your starting total.

You can instantly either deduct or just subtract all of your tipouts to staff as that’s money that never actually makes it out of the club with you.

You can deduct your stage/house fees.You should be keeping a record of what you made for the night/what you tipped out/what you paid in stage fees. This helps for taxes and it’s a good visual overview of how you’re doing at work and helps you see trends like if a certain night is really bad on average.

You can deduct shoes, costumes/lingerie, a practice pole if you have one and bought it in the last year, even stage makeup if you only use it for work (I don’t deduct all my makeup purchases but something like 50% of them). If you mostly buy stuff online you can do searches through your email for terms like “victoria’s secret” “yandy” or if you use amazon you can go through your amazon purchase history and find receipts of everything you bought. If you bought most things with cash - keeping your receipts is smart in case you ever get audited (unlikely but still possible).

You can deduct any advertising expenses (if you made business cards or paid for a premium service for promotion or something).

If you’re a travel dancer you can deduct things like travel expenses, but if you’re just commuting to your local club those travel expenses don’t count. 

If you had health insurance in 2016 - that will help you save money on your taxes. Otherwise they fine you. :(

If you’re going to school and had any scholarships or student loans, those qualify you for tax breaks.



At the end turbotax will ask you if you want “audit insurance” basically. It’s a small additional fee that basically says that a turbotax representative will represent you in case you get audited and handle the whole audit so you don’t have to do it yourself. I purchase this for my own peace of mind. (It’s probably overkill but better safe than sorry.)

As an independent contractor you’ll be paying quarterly estimated payments throughout the year. This makes it easier when you file next year so you don’t have to pay such a big chunk all at once. Your estimates might even be high and you might get a little back come next April! If you’re saving around 30% of what you earn, that’s a good starting estimate of what you’ll need for taxes.



I lived with a CPA for a few years and she taught me the basics of stripper taxes and I’ve done my own for the last few years. It’s not perfect and I am not a tax professional, but this is how I use turbotax to do mine and I’m happy to answer questions if anyone needs help. :)

THANK YOU SO MUCH! REBLOG TO SAVE A LIFE!!

For my girls out there. Much respect y'all.
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delightedobserverintraining:

💖
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positive-memes:

He’s giving out *constructive* criticism
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positive-memes:

Innocent slogan lost in translation is kinda wholesome in its own way.
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Sep. 18th, 2017 08:01 pm
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languageoclock:

this is the most aussie thing i’ve ever read
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bumble-pal:

reminder: you can start over at anytime. your day is not ruined. your world is not over. take a deep breath. start over.
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spacecat211:

trekkiee:

mcroosa:

Mommy teaching babby easier water drinking way because drinking water is hard experience u get it in your nose. Jesus how she puts her paw on his head in the second one. Such concern and love.

THIS IS THE CUTEST THING I HAVE EVER FUCKING SEEN FROM CATS EVER

Aw I’m sorry sweetie, are you okay? No one likes water in their nose, it’s ok. Here, now pay attention, if you do this then you can still drink water and none will get in your nose. Now you try
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martunamajor:

unlimitedtrashworks:

legalizevore:

my dad guillermo laying it out

His table is piled high with food he will never touch but he will kill you for taking the smallest morsel, even if you are starving

shit how did I completely miss the point of this part

Also, his eyes aren’t in his head. They’re in his hands. He only sees what he reaches for, what he desires, what he wants.
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aishastarz:

simsgonewrong:

My sim brought her new born son home and the first thing she wanted to do was interview him 😂

Mom: so what was being born like?
Baby: *cries*
Mom: it was probably worse for me tho, but thanks for the input.
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Sep. 18th, 2017 08:36 pm
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fionagoddess:

Sophie Turner photographed by Justin Campbell.
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Sep. 18th, 2017 08:46 pm
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mxxn-kitten:

heavenlymodels:

Rick and Griff Twombley-King (@rick_and_the_griffopotamus)

Wow 😮
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Rachel

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